Sunday, October 28, 2007
The Sea Inside and The Diving Bell and the Butterfly had a few similarities and many differences. Yes, both men were quadriplegics and unable to move but Bauby had could not communicate with anything but his left eyelid and Ramon could talk just fine. Another similarity is that both of these courageous men wrote books on their stories of life living in their conditions and also to remembrance on their lives before the accidents occurred. A major difference in Bauby and Ramon is that Ramon was way more of a pessimistic person and Bauby was optimistic. Although Bauby was sarcastic and at times angry with his situation he did his best to keep going and remember old times but try to make the most of new times and being unable to move. Ramon on the other hand was pessimistic in that he just wanted to die.I believe that The Sea Inside was more powerful because Ramon was more with it and could interact and speak his mind. I felt so badly for him when he wanted to express his feelings to Julia through things other than talking but couldn’t. Simple everyday things that we take for granted are impossible for Ramon and also for Bauby.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Part two: In part 5, the man known as the "Preacher", pulled Cup over because she had failed to yield the right-of-way and she knew it was because he saw her leaving the dope street. Cup was afraid that he would do something bad to her, but instead he just told her some important information. He told her that she did not belong out there, I think this means that the "Preacher" doesn't think Cup should be living the way she is. He also tells her he knows that God has a plan for Cup and that she is special, but before she turns her life around she will hit rock bottom he tells her. Cup talked to him three more times that year and he kept getting her out of trouble with her dope problems. Ken (Cup's boss) had a baby girl and would be taking off work to help take care of her. Cup decided she would be taking off work too then, but Dorothy( the new secretary) thought this violated Cup's provision but Ken still in a different world from his baby girl said to forget about it and that Cup was fine. The physical effects of Tommy and Cup's drug use were getting worse on their bodies. Tommy had problems with his bowels and Cup would loose control of her facial muscles and couldn't keep her lips closed. Cup said she did not even enjoy getting high anymore and everyday said she would stop getting high but it didn't happen that way. Cup couldn't even get high but she could not stop and hated what the drugs were doing to her body and her life. Daddy and Jr. were discussing Cup and Tommy's drug problem and decided they needed help. Tommy admitted that he wanted help and Cup agreed too. The first step to recovery for Cup was a 12-step program for coke addicts. She and Daddy went to a meeting where they showed them characteristics of cocaine addicts. Cup said that the meeting had convinced her that she was not an addict but she could relate to everything that they described as one. Tommy didn't use for one day but then used dope the next night. Cup stole $500 from someone she loved for the first time, from her Daddy. Daddy went to Tennessee for his father's funeral and said his co-workers had given him money as sympathy of his father, before Daddy even boarded the plane Cup and Tommy had spent it all. When Daddy returned Cup told him how she had stolen his money and he moved out. Daddy said he could no longer watch Cup and Tommy kill themselves. Once Daddy left Cup and Tommy had no reason to try and be responsible and used their money on drugs and had none left for their rent payments. After 2 days of living in a car, they found a new apartment and Cup left Tommy. Cup left him for a terrible reason, that he was just in her way and she figured she could get more high by herself. Tommy threatened Cup and said if she left him she'd leave with nothing and he'd get everything even their car, Cup didn't care and walked to Mona and James's house. They agreed to let Cup live there under 3 conditions, they would control her drinking limits, no crack in the house and the third condition was she had to keep a job and pay rent. Ken was discovering the mistakes Cup was making but she knew she couldn't quit so she tried to get more energy to work harder and one day came up with an idea to commit suicide. Cup was going to her dope spot one day and still thinking of ways to die. She decided she was going to steal dope, when the dope man returned he chased her, smashed her cheekbone into the ground and held a gun to her head. To the mans suprisement Cup told him to kill her and he was astonished from that everything went black and when she woke up she was lying behind a dumpster. Cup could not remember anything, where she'd been the night before what had happened or anything else. Her right temple was hurting very badly but she could not seem to remember anything that had happened. Cup called Ken and so she could take some time off work so she lied and told him that she had Colon cancer. Cupcake came up with a plan for her suicide and it was to get AIDS. Mona caught Cup with her pipe for the third time and kicked her out of her house. Cup decided she would leave at the dumpster that she woke up that one time. While at the dumpster, Cup had time to talk to God and a voice told her to go into work at Ken's office and tell him she was quiting because of a drug problem. So, Cup walked all the way to his office and told him this. Ken told Cup he wanted to help her and got on the phone to get Cup sent into Mesa Vista Hospital. As Cup was on her way to the hospital she kept changing her mind on wither or not to get help and was experiencing withdrawal symptoms. When Cup got to the hospital a lady named Sam asked her numerous questions to figure out where to put her. Cup experienced terrible withdrawals where her hands shook, she was burning hot then cold etc. One of Cup's first assignments in rehab was to write good-bye letters to her drugs and she spent a long time on this.She began attend 12-step meetings at Mesa Vista also. Cup talked to God a lot through her recovery period and attended a lot of meetings on her road to recovery. Cup went to a place called the Alano Club for alcoholics and recovered alcoholics.Cup asks Venita to be her sponsor and met her at the Alano Club.
Monday, October 22, 2007
In this portion of the book at the beginning Cup had just gotten another abortion. This became a piece of cake for her, she’d go into the hospital get the procedure done, come home and get high and drunk and live her normal life. She never learned anything from her mistakes and continues to use her birth control inconsistently. Cup discusses as in a ton of pain and cramps from her abortion and how she has a hard time loving people. Cup had taken sick leave for a week from work and when she returned was fired. Tommy had encouraged and pushed Cup to get a job for many benefits, mainly so they would have more money to get drugs. Mr. Collum( Cup’s boss) had found out that Cup had been smoking and high on the job and was coming late to work and that is why she was fired. The entire third shift (the night shift) was all fired along with Cup for the same reasons. As Mr. Collum was talking to her she didn’t even care she got fired all she cared about was getting high. Cup’s party friends teased her for getting fired and told her that they knew from the start of her job that she wouldn’t keep it. This made Cupcake very frustrated but determined to always quit a job before getting fired. Cup lived by this rule and went through many different jobs. As Cup began to earn more money for drugs then Tommy was making and this made him very insecure. Tommy became almost a different man and started physically abusing Cup. He would also verbally abuse her and yell at her for looking at another man and assume that she had feelings for him. Whenever Tommy would hit or kick Cup she would hit or kick him back just as hard, they had a very abusive and unhealthy relationship. One day the abuse got very bad and Tommy hurt Cup so bad in the car that she got out of it and cussed him out. He got out of the car and cried and apologized and Cup took him back because she thought he must really love her for being so apologetic and she thought he would not continue the abusing, which Cup says he didn’t for almost a year. Tommy and Cup moved into their own apartment together and to keep up rent Cup and Tommy continued work but Cup would also do crime in the night. Tommy’s insecurities were still a big problem and he thought the solution was for him and Cupcake to get married. Cup didn’t really know about this but agreed to it and Tommy wanted a huge wedding so his mother planned the entire thing. Cup applied for a job postion as a legal secretary and got the job at a small law firm. Cup’s boss and co-workers taught her a lot and were very patient with her and although it took Cup a long time for her to learn things she’d get them down perfect once she learned them. Cup discovered a new drug, crack and became instantly obsessed with it. She could not live without it but still convinced herself she did not have a drug problem for whatever reasons she could. But, Cup wanted to see if she could quit smoking crack for a year and she and Tommy did that for about 7 months but still did numerous other drugs. The only thing Cup wanted to pick out for her wedding was her wedding dress. She wanted her dress to have roses on it because that was her mother’s favorite flower and Tommy’s mother sent her money to buy a dress. Cup got roses sown unto it and it was only $100 she spent the rest of the $900 sent from Tommy’s mother for the wedding dress on, you guessed it more drugs. On the day of the wedding Cup was very hung-over and drank and smoked before the wedding and she blacked out at the wedding and it was a blur to her. She didn’t even recall getting married to Tommy and was shocked when she found out she had gone through in marrying him. Cup got reacquainted with her old friends from elementary and they became close again. Tommy’s domestic got worse and worse but no one helped Cup with it or educated her on what it was. Their marriage was definitely on the rocks. On day Tommy got way out of hand because he thought that Cup had cheated on him, when really she was just making a drug deal. He got very abusive, was cussing and almost killed Cup by squeezing her head super hard and throwing her head to the ground. Cup then called 911 and they came and took Tommy to the hospital. Cup went to visit him, but just to get money for dope.
I think this quote represents what the overall tone of the story is, that Cup uses drugs and drinking to get through any and all obstacles she faces in her life. After her mother's death Cupcake was left with a crazy foster parent and her life was changed dramatically. Cup began using drugs heavily and in this quote it means that after Cup would get high off of the drugs she wouldn't have to think or feel or remember all the things she dealt with such as death of a parent, rape, homelessness and having several abortions. Cup also frequently would get so drunk she'd black out and her entire life revolved around how she would get a hold of more drugs and more alcohol, nothing else really mattered to her. I believe that she coped with her issues by using drugs and drinking because she did not have to feel the pain she has.
"Should I take the easy way out or, for once in my life, try to actually learn something, earn something, finish something."-Cupcake Brown (page 183)
This quote also represents the tone of this memoir because all throughout the book Cup's was looking for ways to get the easy way out of things. From age 11 to her mid-twenties her entire life is just one big party and all she cared about was that, drinking and drug use. This quote is talking about the particular part of the book when Cup pays Sara one hundred dollars to update Cup's records and make it seem like she took her required courses of college and this is how Cupcake got her certificate of graduation for "completing" college. Cup also took the easy way out with the death of her mother. Instead of dealing with this great loss and talking to people about it, she covered up her tears with a smile and a joint. Cup became pregnant many times and each time she took the easy way out and got abortions. I think if she would have kept the baby she would have learned alot and had a better life, but I believe she was afraid to love because she didn't feel much love from anybody in her growing up except for Daddy and Jr.
Monday, October 8, 2007
Sunday, October 7, 2007
I am reading the book "A Piece of Back" for my outside reading memoir. The memoir is about a girl, Cupcake Brown and how her life changes after she finds her mother dead when she was just 11 years old. Her real father was then given custody of her and her brother, Larry but he only wanted them for the money and gave them up to a foster home. At the foster home Cup was abused and raped and lived a terrible life cleaning all day long and getting nasty meals. She decided to run away and learned the ropes of prostitution, drug dealing and gangs. Cup became very addicted to alcohol, weed, crystal meth, cocaine and acid. The book has many strengths, the main one being that it is very descriptive and makes you feel Cup's pain right along there with her. One weakness is that the book is very long. I understand that Cupcake's life has many different aspects and parts she wanted to put into her memoir its just a long read. The issues brought up are all very tough.Drugs and drug dealers are a scary topic but yet appear in my life in that people I know do drugs and is hard because i do not agree with their decisions. Abortion is also brought up in the book which is a very tough topic. I personally am torn up on this topic. I think it should be the mothers choice whether or not to keep the baby, but if the mother is in Cup's situation and sleeping with many different men and for the wrong reasons. I am for abortion if the situation is different and has to deal with rape. Another topic brought up is alcoholism. My best friend’s mom is an alcoholic and so I know how difficult this can be on family. I predict that Cupcake will turn her life around and make something out of her life in the end and get through all of her struggles.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Cupcake Brown is now a very successful lady. She has written a memoir of her life and is a lawyer at a large firm in San Fransisco where she lives. Cup also speaks all over the country telling her story of how even through all of the negative things that had happened in her life she still found hope and made her dreams come true.Brown realized she wanted to change her life around when she saw a reflection of herself in a window and saw really just how much the drugs were effecting her. She then went to college for eleven and a half years then to law school and ended up graduating in the top 10% of her class!Cupcake Brown is a one of kind person to have that much courage to change her life around and make something of herself. http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/03/14/earlyshow/main1399040_page2.shtml
http://www.cupcakebrown.com/index2.html(picture and info)